You know it's your fourth child when...

Recently, there have been a series of commercials telling us how awesome we are the second time around as parents.  After the hyper-sensitivity of first-time parents, we easily slide into perfect parenting the second go-round. 

I CALL SHENANIGANS.  Just saying.  For me, at least, I was a terrible second-time parent. I was probably less relaxed with Judah than with Elijah, and didn't make good adjustments on the fly at all.  Frankly, I think my second time set me back at least until the fourth child.  Ah... but now that I've got four... now I'm a perfect parent.  (I think I just heard Rachel snort so loud I need to go check on her to make sure she didn't rupture a nostril.)   In all seriousness, I STILL CALL SHENANIGANS.  Poor little Aryel has to undergo so much more craziness then our first two that it may take years of therapy to undo some of it, although quite frankly he's so mellow most of it doesn't bother him.

Without further ado, I present to you the top reasons you can tell in our family that there's six of us and no less...

#1 -- you take family photos at the bowling alley.  We might all be crying, darn it, but you can't tell in the blacklight.  Also, it's cheaper than posing for Sears portraits.  And less bleeding.

#2 -- you hire the cheapest babysitters possible... in this case, Insignia!  (Yes, TV might make them instantly stupider, but it makes them instantly quieter.  For 30 minutes a day, the trade-off is WORTH IT.)

#3: You get together with other families with 4 kids and take 8-child photos in which you realize that Jael can hold her own in a fight because she's the only lady present.  (No, seriously, half the children in this photo are terrified of her.)

#4: By the fourth kid, the baby becomes the football.  Thankfully, this handoff was successful.

#5: After you have an entire band in your house, you let them rock out --UPSTAIRS.  Always upstairs.  Especially if they're playing your entire selection of pots and pans.

And finally, you know you've got a gaggle of children if....

they successfully storm your bed and throw you out! (and you happily sneak off for a quiet cup of coffee and try to ignore the fact that it sounds like your room is imploding....)

Now, about me being a perfect parent...