(Jael isn't crying above, but nobody takes stock photos of their kids crying to have on hand when needed for blogposts! Someone should think of these things!)
So while it isn't exactly my life's dream to make EVERYBODY cry, sometimes it just happens. Rachel had gone out for some much-needed time with other ladies at a book party, which makes me jealous because if I wasn't such an introvert, I totally would have invited myself. (Heard the joke about the introvert who threw a party... all his guests stayed in their room and thought quietly is his honor? But I digress)
Anyhow, Rachel was gone and I had all four for the night. Now I would like it stated for the record that I am a pro, and the children do not scare me :) . However, as I commented to the lady at the grocery store on Sunday when she said, "You're running those three like a well-oiled machine...", to which my reply was, "ah, but I don't have the baby. With kids, easy is one less than you actually have,"
I was right. Three - easy. Four - not so much. When we have five (we're not having five,) four would be easy. (see below for three being easy)
Right now, however, it looks more like this -- "ALL RIGHT, EVERYONE, time for bed." (Two go
upstairs, one starts running for the downstairs Legos with a smirk on her little face. Corral her to find that the toothpaste wars have begun... think Star Wars lightsaber toothbrushes.)
"ALL RIGHT, STOP IT! Judah, in bed. Elijah, in bed. Jael, stop climbing the ladder to Elijah's bed. Aryel, keep sitting like an angel. " (Wait, what!)
"Dad, look! Jael can climb the whole ladder! " (Indeed.)
"Dad, can we all jump on Elijah's bed now that Jaelster can climb ladders?"
"NO."
"Dad, why are you so mean?" (Remove Jael from ladder, where she is about to teeter off at 4 feet up -- Jael starts caterwauling)
"Dad, you let her back up there now!!!" (Judah's overdeveloped sense of justice kicks in and he starts screaming at me.)
And so there I was -- in the middle of quiet time, I had Jael screaming that she was a big kid now, Judah defending the right of children to disobey their parents at any time and with no prior notice, Elijah screaming for everyone to be quiet, and Aryel screaming because, let's face it, it sounded like the hounds of hell were coming for us and that's a little bit scary.
What to do?
I decided it was time to pull out my 'valuable life lessons' hat, because -- frankly-- the baying was beginning to affect me and I couldn't remember my own name at this point, and no matter how far away I drop Jael off in the house, she comes bouncing back like a bad check.
"KIDS," I said to the older two, "there will be times when everyone around you will be making terrible noise (I resisted the urge to quote them Rudyard Kipling's poem If), and it's especially important then that you listen. Remember the parable of the Good Shepherd?
"YES, DAD, WE KNOW. THE SHEEP KNOW HIS VOICE!"
And that was that -- we prayed our goodnight prayers amidst the "howling mad hullabaloo" (bonus points if you know what book that's a quote from) and went to bed.
Glory hallelujah! (Aryel thought so too)
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